Wat the fuck is wrong with the fucking world. wat the fuck is wrong with me??? KNNCCBY! i should go KNN CCY! if u know wat i mean. kns.

What the fuck is wrong with my fucking tagboard.. every single fucking things go wrong when u're at your lowest... i feel life is laughing at me now..

"APPLICATION DENIED"

Had a weird weekend full of mixed emotions.....

Bf booked out early on fri, around 3 plus.. and we went straight to his hse and just rotted around... went out on Sat.. Went town... shopped around... I was damn damn happy on Sat... I kept thinking im going to know my results for admission soon... since the appeal period is coming near.. but little did i know................ haiz.... i was even shopping around for what to wear IF i get into uni.. (which i tot i could).. I even said i wanted to buy the jacket and bag from limited edition.. and even the shoes... those shall be wat i'll wear and bring when i get into uni... i was day dreaming the entire day about going school all over again... thinking what kinda pencil box should i get and whether should i buy more pens and stuff like that... i was thinking back those days when we were taking notes in colourful pens in on our lecture notes..i was thinking how we used to shop around for nice pens and highlighters.... i was thinking how happy i'd feel to do those things again...

later that day.. went to Ah Nan.. (yes, again) with bf... the abalone soup tasted as good... maybe even better... but my bf didn't seem to have any expression.. but i guess he enjoyed the food as much as i did... nothing seems to please his taste buds...

anyway... went home earlier that day... and bf's frens asked him to go kbox... we were like "huh........... we dun even sing when his frens are ard... no money somemore.." but thank goodness they said they will treat us.. so we were like, why not.... little did i expect when i was at kbox halfway.... a fren of mine called me and told me the bad news... she told me her application for nus was denied... and she sounded damn sad..i felt damn sorry for her.. and at the same time, damn worried for my outcome as well...all along she'd been there to fret with me over the university admisson thingy.. she always called me and discussed with me about the admissions... we helped each other we comforted each other...but when she called me to tell me the news, i didn't know wat to say to her... i know she's damn disappointed.. i know she will cry... but i couldn't do anything... and i asked her to help me chck as my bf's internet connection was down.. and i received the same news as well... "application denied"... i didn't know how to react... and there i was daydreaming about what it is like to be in school once again, there i was thinking about what i should wear to sch... haizZzz... i almost couldn't believe it.. and all along i've thought my grades MAYBE enough just to scrape pass...

well.. what can i say... hopes are dashed.... feeling damn fucking low moraled.... dono wat to do... feels a sense of hopelessness overwhelming me.. no mood for anything now...........

on a lighter note.. there's still the appeal... though i know it's seriously no use...

Bad pics.. can't really see...

anyway.. just received a stupid letter.. a rejection letter frm SMU... should i be relieved that it's not frm NUS or NTU or should i be upset that it means i have one chance lesser to get into local uni? real fucked up... the weird thing is that the letter was dated 20th May and i got it only today... kns. the uni admissions system is really damn screwed up..

Btw, just to inform any of u guys who are appealing for NTU, you CANNOT appeal if you HAVE NOT gotten the rejection letter frm the sch. I just emailed the OAD.. haizz.... HOWEVER, the online appeal deadline is on the 16th June and we will be notified of the results of the appeal by END OF JUNE OR EARLY JULY. (which means if either our rejection or acceptance letter doesnt come BEFORE 16th june, we're screwed, wun be able to appeal in time). ya, tat's how fucked up the fucking system is. and which means that the appeal we did previously is VOID. FUCKING HELL. NTU SUCKS! i dun see why NUS have this kinda fucking problems! (dun talk too soon, u'll nvr know till the appeal period)

and another thing, my lil' bro's result is terrible.. i can't bear to see his report book.. how can a pri 1 get only 60+ marks for maths?? if he can get 60+ marks now... then what will he get when he gets to pri2???????? Even the teacher also said that you definitely CANNOT get less than 80 marks when u're in Pri 1, cos ur marks will DEFINITELY DROP as u grow up! which means my bro might fail when he reach pri2!!! and not only his maths, his english and chinese subjects marks are terrible as well.. goodness..... and i think wat the teacher said is very very true.. i had 98-99 marks when i was in pri1, and the marks dropped as i went up.. but not too much for me to fail.. i remembered i still at least had 75 and above (for all subjects) by the time i reached pri6....

Those were the days....

reminiscing...

Best pals..

Da tou tie... hahhaa.. big heads...

hmmm.. looking at those pics of the abalone noodles and soup made my mouth water.. :P though im still damn full now... but i just cant stop thinking about the soup!.. should really really bring my bf/frens to tat stall someday..

Even the tissue also got the brand...

Abalone noodles!!... (hehe half eaten...)

Abalone soup... look at tat big clam or scallop?..

Wanton Soup..

Outside Mica Building

on the bus.. AGAIN

On the bus... on the way to Ah Nan's

Wanted to go suntanning this morning but it was raining so darn heavily... kns... no, not raining heavily, it was a bloody storm, got lightning and thunder... ARGH... spoilt my day... but anyway, met vel in the afternoon instead and went town to walk around... and she treated me to Ah Nan's Abalone Noodles (as belated bday treat)!!! DAMN NICE AH!!! the soup base was heavenly... super super nice...

I had abalone noodes and she even ordered the abalone soup and another bowl of dumplings... wa... can't forget the taste.. the soup's too good to be true.. hehehe.. *lame* although it took us quite awhile to walk there...but i think it was damn worth...

and i realised i still haven thank vel for the treat... hehehe.. thanks girl!!

along the way we even took tonnes of pictures... we were retarded enough to take pictures on the bus... hahhahha... and the sound frm our cameras were so loud we even scared the couple sitting infront of us.. :P

all in all......... had a very very nice day, nice meal, nice chat...

Why do people blog?

Somehow this question just popped out of nowhere in my head...

do ppl blog for attention? (well, not for me, i think, but its starting to be.. i admit)

or do ppl blog for their own self interests? (as in, just plainly an online diary? i dun, i think, not totally)

then why do i blog?

i blog cos i wanna let ppl know how i feel.. cos i nvr showed any of my emotions on my face, i dun talk about my woes alot, it's just an instrument for me to vent my angers, woes, in a way, my blog is my listening post, a friend... though most of the time im talking to myself when i blog...

i blog for tat little attention it gives me, i want my frens to look at my blog at times, want them to give comments as there's alot of things i can't decide on my own, due to my super lack of self-confidence. i want my frens to know wats going on inside me so they wun ask me, and they wun meet with awkward silence or avoidance frm me..

or maybe even sometimes when u are very unhappy with someone, u'll tend to hint here and there on ur blog and hopefully tat person dun get ur hint cos u just want to let it out..without spoiling ur relationship...and maybe enhancing ur relationship if tat person does get wat u mean and try to be a better fren/bf..

i blog for another reason too, to try improve my english, which i dun think had much effects. my english is still bottom scraping poor. pardon my lousy descriptions. or imagery. or watever. do u even call it an imagery? i just cant think of that word! i really do feel i disgrace the entire arts cohort. my english is so darn poor no one ever understands wat im talking abt. no wonder my gp got such fucking lousy grades.

back in depressing mood... once again.. its come to this again... fucked up....real fucked up....

hey..anyone interested in making a class blog?... well.. just came across me maybe that'll be a good idea to keep the "class spirit" (if we had any in the first place).. well.. lame.. childish.. heh..but im serious.. if anyone's interested.. tag me.. :P

hmmm... got this from a fren's blog... the birthdate one is not very true.... I definitely dun have the will power and self confidence.. :P well maybe on CERTAIN things i have... HOWEVER, the other test is definitely very true...

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who have a split personality - cold as ice on the outside but hot as fire in the heart.

In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored.

You'd like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful... that you'll never change.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic.

Your ideal relationship is comforting. You crave a relationship where you always feel warmth and love.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.

In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

Your Birthdate: May 19

Your birth on the 19th day of the month adds a tone of independence and extra energy to your life path. But at the same time, it poses a number of obstacles to overcome before you are able to be as independent as you would like. The number 1 energy suggests more executive ability and leadership qualities than your path may have indicated. A birthday on the 19th of any month gives greater will power and self-confidence, and very often a rather original approach. However, a somewhat self-centered approach to life that may be in conflict with some of the other influences in your life. This 1 energy may diminish your ability and desire to handle details, preferring instead to paint with a broad brush. You are sensitive, but your feeling stay somewhat repressed. You have a compelling manner that can be dominating in many situations. You do not tend to follow convention or take advice very well. Consequently, you tend to learn through experience; sometimes hard experiences. The 19/1 is a loner number and you may experience feelings of being alone even if you are married. You may take on a tendency to be nervous and angry.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Still no letters in my mailbox... haizZzz...

LONGGGGGGG weekend...but now that it's over..seemed short somehow... it was an extremely long weekend for me as i was at my bf's place since thurs... (my bday).. and my bf took leave on fri... and the weirdest thing was tat we spent alllllllllllll of the time at his hse... except for an hr or two when we went compasspoint to buy stuffs to cook for the nxt day...

well.. our spaghetti failed... quite terribly... we cooked too much noodles and too little spaghetti sauce.. and we spent like more than an hr preparing, cooking and washing up but spent like only less than half an hr to eat.... hahahhaha... HATE the clearing up part.. though the cooking part was always nice.. we always cooked at home.. we will either cook porridge (with egg, mushroom meat balls, sotong balls, prawns, sliced pork, crabmeat... hahhaa...mixed porridge), or mui fan (rice with gravy and mentioned ingredients), or just rice with campbell soup, nuggets, ham and eggs... though they doesn't sound nice and we ALWAYS use the same old ingredients like all the meatballs.. we always enjoyed eating our not-very-nice food...

anyway.... was really happy at his hse.. for once.. we played playstation games.. we wrestled.. we tickled each other nearly to death (and i mean it)..and we even played stupid games..we put our heads together under the bedsheet, turned up the sound of the tv, and guess wat advertisement issit just by listening.. (and of cos, i always win).. but it was damn damn funny and cute...

just hope this will continue.... but well, i really wanna go town with him again though, as much as i liked being at his hse for once... :P

Simply LOVEEEEEEEE the watch my bf gave me...though i admit.. its a little big for my hands..hehhe... studded with many many rhinestones... so nice!...

GUESS box..

Nice box!..

Nice watch hubby gave me!!..

But hubby din look too interested... hahahha..

Nice food at Sakura..

at sakura

Funky farm handwash... the cow is sooo cute..

A DAMN FUNNY PICTURE!!!... hahahhaha... had me laughing for quite awhile...

At wheelock..

Sentosa..

At hard rock cafe...

Those were the days...

One of the many pages frm the scrapbook

Special thanks to Lynn, Veron, Maybelline, Rachel for the scrapbook and the funky farm cow handwash...Especially the scrapbook...damn nice.. And also Jolly who te di came down to meet me and bought a present for me!..


More thanks to Lynn, Ron and May for spending the day out with me... HAD SO MUCH FUN!!!! IT WAS A FANTASTIC DAY FOR ME!! REALLY!.. ONE OF MY HAPPIEST DAY OF MY LIFE!..


And not to forget those who remembered my birthday and msged me happy birthday via sms... Zawani, Maybel, Baoyue, Kenneth, Pam, Annie, Kumar, Michelle, Velveta, Zixian, Peiyu and Syamz...





And of cos....last but not least... to my beloved hubby... who spent the day after work with me even though he's damn tired... We went Sakura buffet restaurant and went ps to watch Star Wars Episode 3 (damn nice show ah!!! super nice!!)...



and he gave me a surprise when he hid the present at my side of the bed at his hse.. under a small table.........



and it was one of the nicest gift i've had....



one that i've always been telling him that i wanted it...


A GUESS watch....

Happy birthday to me... though it's one day late.. hehehhe...

It was one of my most unforgettable birthdays in my life... Had alot of fun with Lynn, Ron and May...

Started off on the 18th morning when i received a msg frm lynn saying that BOTH she and ron will be late.. i started to smell something amiss.. hehe.. then i msged may and she ALSO said she's gonna be late... nvm.. then i took cab down to taka... lynn and ron said they were not there yet.. then when i called blur queen may.. she said "WE are here alrdy.." and she suddenly realised her mistake and burst out laughing... it was damn damn damn funny....

met up with them later and went Marche to have our lunch...

and of cos... we took pictures..

We had crepes, Black pepper pizza... and Rosti.. Then lynn came back with a chocolate truffle with a lighted candle...

Well and of cos.. i took pics with the nice looking cake...

and made a wish...

And they made me bite the candle... :P thank goodness they din push the candle in...

And they presented me with their gifts.... it was "Wan Simple Book For Carine" and a "Funky Farm" handwash... SO CUTEEE!!!! Especially the "Wan Simple Book For Carine"... I could tell they spent quite a lot of time making it...

While I was looking at the scrapbook...

They took many ugly pictures of me.... yucks.. ARGH...

*oohhh*

I was so engrossed..

and din realised they were happily eating away the remains of my chocolate truffle... hahhahaha...

But i had the last bite :P

We took many more pics....

We even got the waitress to take a pic for us....

After having lunch at marche.... We went kbox!... somehow i felt we din really sang that day... just kept talking and talking and talking... hahhaha... well as you've guessed....

We took MORE photos...

And we had a hard time adjusting the camera for self timer... and our photos turned out like that...

And like that..

May left earlier and met us at 11 plus later at night at zouk... and we went espirit to try out some tank tops....

Lynn and Ron went into one room, and I went to the other room...but after i've changed.. i waited and waited damn long outside for them to come out.. but they din...

and guess wat they were doing inside....

they were taking pictures... AGAIN...

And made me wait for them for soooooooooo long...

After trying out those tops for ard half an hr... or more.. those two vain pots bought the tops they bought.. BUT i din... heh..

And we proceeded to New Asia Bar at Swissotel... It was a damn high class bar on level 70.... The sight there was breathtaking... and it was happy hour before 9... too bad on drinks only....

well... we even took pictures in such a high class place...

And lynn got caught in the act for looking at guys... hahhahah...

Later at night.. I went to orchard to meet up with jolly... and was so surprised tat she actually knew tat day was my bday.... and she gave me such a cuteeeeeeeeee eeyore!!... so cute!.. the fur is so soft and nice to touch!...

After meeting jolly... we went zouk and met maybelline there... had a great time there... the music that day was fantastic...