"APPLICATION DENIED"

Had a weird weekend full of mixed emotions.....

Bf booked out early on fri, around 3 plus.. and we went straight to his hse and just rotted around... went out on Sat.. Went town... shopped around... I was damn damn happy on Sat... I kept thinking im going to know my results for admission soon... since the appeal period is coming near.. but little did i know................ haiz.... i was even shopping around for what to wear IF i get into uni.. (which i tot i could).. I even said i wanted to buy the jacket and bag from limited edition.. and even the shoes... those shall be wat i'll wear and bring when i get into uni... i was day dreaming the entire day about going school all over again... thinking what kinda pencil box should i get and whether should i buy more pens and stuff like that... i was thinking back those days when we were taking notes in colourful pens in on our lecture notes..i was thinking how we used to shop around for nice pens and highlighters.... i was thinking how happy i'd feel to do those things again...

later that day.. went to Ah Nan.. (yes, again) with bf... the abalone soup tasted as good... maybe even better... but my bf didn't seem to have any expression.. but i guess he enjoyed the food as much as i did... nothing seems to please his taste buds...

anyway... went home earlier that day... and bf's frens asked him to go kbox... we were like "huh........... we dun even sing when his frens are ard... no money somemore.." but thank goodness they said they will treat us.. so we were like, why not.... little did i expect when i was at kbox halfway.... a fren of mine called me and told me the bad news... she told me her application for nus was denied... and she sounded damn sad..i felt damn sorry for her.. and at the same time, damn worried for my outcome as well...all along she'd been there to fret with me over the university admisson thingy.. she always called me and discussed with me about the admissions... we helped each other we comforted each other...but when she called me to tell me the news, i didn't know wat to say to her... i know she's damn disappointed.. i know she will cry... but i couldn't do anything... and i asked her to help me chck as my bf's internet connection was down.. and i received the same news as well... "application denied"... i didn't know how to react... and there i was daydreaming about what it is like to be in school once again, there i was thinking about what i should wear to sch... haizZzz... i almost couldn't believe it.. and all along i've thought my grades MAYBE enough just to scrape pass...

well.. what can i say... hopes are dashed.... feeling damn fucking low moraled.... dono wat to do... feels a sense of hopelessness overwhelming me.. no mood for anything now...........

on a lighter note.. there's still the appeal... though i know it's seriously no use...