i can't take it anymore!!!!!!!! arghhh......... i dont understand why u must always spoil my Sundays...... y do u have to spoil it with your moodswings? i was looking forward to a very nice sunday with you.... we'd planned to cook at ur hse since nobody was at home.... but u had to spoil it right in the early morning with ur moodswings.....

whatever........

on a much lighter note.... all in all i had alot of fun in JB for the past 2 days.... i just wished it didn't have to end the nice wkend this soon.....

bad? good? sudden pounding, breathless....bad omen? good?

Everything - Michael Buble

You're a falling star, You're the get away car.

You're the line in the sand when I go too far.

You're the swimming pool, on an August day.

And you're the perfect thing to say.

And you play it coy, but it's kinda cute.

Ah, When you smile at me you know exactly what you do.

Baby don't pretend, that you don't know it's true.

Cause you can see it when I look at you.

[Chorus:]And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times.

It's you, it's you, You make me sing.

You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.

You're a carousel, you're a wishing well,

And you light me up, when you ring my bell.

You're a mystery, you're from outer space,

You're every minute of my everyday.

And I can't believe, uh that I'm your man,

And I get to kiss you baby just because I can.

Whatever comes our way, ah we'll see it through,

And you know that's what our love can do.

[Chorus:]And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times.

It's you, it's you, You make me sing.

You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.

So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La.

So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La.

[Chorus:]And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times.

It's you, it's you, You make me sing.

You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.

You're every song, and I sing along.

'Cause you're my everything.

Yeah, yeah.

So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La

So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La, La, La, La, La.

in love with this song that my best buddy from the office introduced to me....such a SWEET sweet song.......... awwwww....

i can sense an oncoming bout of flu....... im screwed... i can't fall sick these 2 wks....i got things to clear.... and im clearing my leave nxt wk..... so i got to do everything by monday.... i was told to hand everything up by nxt monday morning..... and i havent even finish anything yet.... im dead....

i've decided not to bitch about work here..... just in case... so i deleted the whole entry..... it's just not right... like WHAT IF they managed to find my blog... i just realised i broadcasted my blog on my friendster... so it's not a good idea afterall.... sigh..... tats the thing about public blog... you can't bitch... maybe i shud set up another one.... just for bitching.... and random rants abt work....

hmmm... i still haven't got time to upload photos from my d&d.... ALOT of photos... i gotta go sieve them all out.... might do it in the office tml... wahahha... best employee award goes to me, and angeline.... we do the most retarded things in the office can.... i shall not name them here, for fear of ears behind the wall.... watever the case, we rock.... hahaha.... the office apparently had been very boring without us, the rowdy gang...... we've been at the client's place for the past wk........ different clients somemore.... the only way of communication is thru sms, and SKYPE.... SKYPE IS THE BEST can..... makes me forget about my heavy workload..... MASS SKYPING is the best.... rocks man.... we talk uber cock in skype... and we always burst out laughing at our monitors while everybody else is working.... i told u, best employees............please, i got do my work ok..... just that i can multi task RATHER well.... well, maybe it distracts a TAD bit, but still, i dont think it matters, as long as i get my work done.... good enough.... i just wasted my wkend on the bf's assignment..... can i get the best gf award also? we went it's ok, he returned by sending me to work almost the whole of last wk, and also tomorrow! woohoo.... i can have time to la teh and have my breakfast in the morning cos i'll be damn early can............

anyway, driving to Suntec is CRAZY... fucking ERP costs 6 frigging bucks..... he sent me to the client's place twice last wk and he's been grumbling abt the ERP non-stop.... i can't blame him.... it's really fucking crazily expensive..... knn.... anyway, im such a good gf. give me a pat on my back.

argh.................. just feel like shouting...... this D&D thing is DRIVING ME NUTS........ it was fun, INITIALLY.... towards the end as it comes nearer and nearer to the actual performance i feel like giving up.... it's sooooo draining..... i'm part of the organising committee for the group's dance performance and we got to start everything from scratch..... from the music to the dance to choosing the ppl and even to choreographing moves.... i can't believe i'm actually choreographing dance moves when i really suck at dancing.... i think i look like a faggot when i dance...... grrr..... can't even shake my butts can't move, i'm always so stiff.... im so scared ppl will actually laugh at me when i dance.......

we've been marathoning for this D&D for the past couple of days ON TOP of our own workload..... it's really overwhelming..... i'm going to faint soon....... we ate dinner at only 9 plus for 3 consecutive days i think..... did i mention i had very bad gastric yesterday? i almost fainted of hunger & gastric again today, yeahness to gastritis, or however u spell that....... i didn't think i'd ever ever have gastric problems........ but now i'm doubtful... hur.... considering the superrrrrr not regular meals...... and i'm always forgetting to eat...... i swear i can forget to eat ok? dont doubt me.... i can swear on it..... the bf doesn't believe that i can forget to eat.... but tat's because when i'm with him the only thing we do is to eat....... so i'll nvr forget...... but when i'm alone, i'll forget to eat...... although i'll feel hungry i'll still forget cos after being too hungry you wont even feel like eating anymore.... but nobody believes i can forget to eat, so fuck it.....

i've been always in a daze, especially in the mornings...... and i realised it's starting to get from bad to worst..... it's been like the 2nd time this wk i think, that i've been honked by a car in the morning cos i havent been paying attention when i'm crossing the road...... shit......... dont know wat the fuck im doing....... if this is the case now, i wonder wat will happen during super peak period..... i'll be more likely to die from car accident than stress from work..... *CHOI!! TOUCH WOOD*

i'm broke. very broke. ya i just got my pay but im sibeh broke. alot of liabilities. alot of bloody things to buy. ENDLESS things to buy. boss's wedding nxt wkend must give red packet, SHIT. D&D dono wtf to wear. EH ANYONE GOT 80s STYLE dresses/tops watever to lend me?! I DONT WANNA WASTE MONEY BUY LEH!!!

This ultra long weekend was rather fulfilling for me.... did alot of things..... Friday: KTV with colleagues

Saturday: Helped bf do assignment + watched soccer with his frens at night

Sunday: Did assignment AGAIN + Prawning till 3.30am

FIFTY TWO PRAWNS!

Monday: Bf's mummy's birthday at Bottle Tree park for dinner and FISH SPA.....ya i know fish spa will get the fungus thing, but we only did for like 15mins ok one lah.... it was DAMN ticklish! and superrrrr gross when i first stepped inside the pool.... but after awhile it felt quite shiok... hahaha..

Look at our reaction when we first stepped in.... my expression DAMN UGLY...

Dinner at Bottle Tree park/village

Tuesday: JB!!!! made my new specs (yes, oakley again, cost me a bomb), i hope the frame i chose doesn't go out of trend easily... made the decision in sort of a rush, and out of peer pressure.... shit.... and i went for full body massage! shiokness! but it was bloody painful and ticklish ah.... but it was SIBEH funny to see the bf screaming and squirming in his seat when he got tortured by a hugeass guy... hahahah... the bf is super lousy can!! he can't stand pain at all, he had to hold on to my hands and squeeze the little bolster and he even pleaded the guy to STOP for him to rest.. can you believe it? he was really SCREAMING lor.... and SO WAS THE OTHER GUY.... damn funny can?! the girls were in pain too but the most we did was a small whimper... the guys?! screaming their lungs out.... tsk tsk tsk.... i've learnt something today, GUYS CANT STAND PAIN.....

anyway! my wkend was FUN! i want to go Bottle Tree park again, i wanna play paint ball there!! sounds damn fun ah..... i didn't join previously when the company organised it cos it was a REAL competition, CPA games.... yes, auditors know how to have fun too k? they have CPA games.... inter audit firms games...i can so imagine nerdy, geeky auditors playing... wahahha... no lah, my company's auditors are not at all like wat i've described..... anyway, there's bball, pool, CS, soccer, badminton and even paint ball for CPA games.... it's kinda cool... and we won quite a few....

will be back to work tml again... SIAN... can't wait for friday to come again!

just came back from prawning.... tired but can't sleep.... the 3 of them caught FIFTY TWO prawns ah..... like wtf.....brand new record..... i ate prawns till i got sick of it.... i hope i wont fall sick tml....... prawns overdose.... took pictures... but lazy to pose it up.... shall do it another day and show our catch....

took leave on Tuesday and sort of regretted it, just realised i dont have anything to do, really dont want to waste my leave just like that..... i wanted to go for a short overseas trip to Batam or Genting.... but apparently the bf doesn't want to go..... *sighs* planned to cook at home on Tuesday but his parents are not working on that day, which means it's a no-go too.... we're planning to go JB for a day of shopping and making my specs........... i REALLY HOPE it'll work out cos i really want to go make my specs.... my specs is going to break anytime soon, cos i bloody sat on it for more than 3 times i think..... i brought it to the oakley care centre and they told me it's beyond repair.... my specs is crooked like shit and causing alot of pressure on my ears..... hurts alot.... i just want to get out of singapore lah......

it was a blast of a night yesterday..... if i hadn't seen it with my own eyes, i wouldn't have thought that even AUDITORS can be THAT CRAZY.... hahahhaha.... i kept smiling to myself the whole of today cos i kept thinking back to yesterday's crazy night at Kbox..... really shen jing bing.... everyone went CRAZY except me and 2 other male colleagues.... hahhaha... i can't go crazy without alcohol la.... but i enjoyed myself thoroughly.... it felt REALLY GOOD to go have fun after a long week at work.... and i'm sure the rest felt the same way too, given their crazy antics that night.... it was really F.U.N can...... although i may LOOK bored to them, cos i din sing much....my voice is like SHIT and will go haywire one, how to sing.... BUT, i was enjoying myself so much i couldn't stop laughing.... although towards the end i was really so damn sleepy i actually fell asleep even though they were screaming their lungs out... REALLY SCREAMING.... not kidding.... even some auntie came and look at us....

anyway,i feel so blessed with such crazy, loveable colleagues..... looking forward to another session with them SOON, before the peak comes.... it's actually the peak now... but it's just the start... i hope we can still have fun before the work comes pouring in....

Thank goodness for great colleagues at work.... not just colleagues, i think i've found a great bunch of good friends..... audit life would be SO DEAD without them........ at least i feel i'm still alive and kicking with them around.... they ARE SO FUNNY CAN...... i laughed myself to death today while we had dinner together..... i nearly threw up my subway while i laughed till my tears almost trickled down....

my fren always say "傻人有傻福" i'm always lucky to find very gam kakis whereever i go...... be it in school, office or anywhere..... i'm so glad i found them....

it's been 3 wks since i last blogged........ and no, i'm not dead yet although i'm almost there.....

well, other than some office politics here and there...... i'm very happy with my working environment... and enjoying the warmth of my lovely colleagues especially the lunch-group-gang..... and i'm often touched by the way we stay back to help finish each other's work, often till very late at night..... we actually do stay back and try to help out..... but often, i'm the one who needs the help...... hahaha... they always stay back to help/accompany me..... which really touches me, and often makes me very paiseh to make them stay back for me..... the point i'm trying to say is, i'd thought it was very difficult to find good friends you can really trust and be with, who really cares and go all out to HELP, when u step into the so called "adults" working life...... i guess i was VERY wrong...... i found one whole gang of them.....

oh my god i'm so frigging BUSY can.... i'm so busy i feel TIRED EVERY SINGLE DAMN DAY....... grrr..... i've got like tonnes of things to do..... and the for the 2nd time in my life i actually brought my work back today and actually DID IT.... big round of applause for me please..... i nvr once did my assignments from uni at home can.... NEVER...... i always do it on the spot right after class or smth and just do it haphazardly..... now, if i do it "any-o-how" i will KENA from the bosses, and MIGHT also get myself into litigation troubles.....

BACK TO WORK. *growls*

i miss his smile he flashes whenever he meets me after work..... i miss the way he tells me that he misses me and the only motivation after his work is meeting me.... i really wish he comes back...

i find him more and more irksome the more i see him.... the long face he pulls whenever he sees me....... i know he finds me fucking irritating.... then what for we meet? i just want time off. i need time off. time off from his irksome, irritating face. i need time off from his black face everytime he sees me. he won't even listen to me anymore. he can totally ignore whatever questions i ask him, pretending he didn't hear anything at all.

it's so obvious something is wrong. i'm just waiting for the time to break up with him. really. it's not that i don't love him. it's just damn obvious he don't love me anymore. can't you tell from all these reactions he gives me?

i was never much of a music/song fan..... i don't normally listen to music and only listen to radio occasionally (point being, i only listen to mainstream songs)...... but i just realised i SHOULD listen to music while working cos working hours will pass alot quicker.......... i was listening to mambo songs and i've got such an impulse to go clubbing......... i've been deprived of alot of things recently (or maybe since long ago) and i think i need to get my deprivation satisfied.......... it's sad.... cos when u start working, when u start a relationship, you lose everything....... you lose your social life.... you lose your occasional dosage of clubbing fun....... you lose alot of things and forget how to have fun, forget how to laugh really sincerely........ which i realised, are important elements of my life to make me feel happy again........ one cannot have total refrain......... it'll KILL you slowly and surely.

i cant believe my stupidity........ i brought my working papers out to do while waiting for the bf to study for his exams.... but i didn't bring out my BRAND NEW thumbdrive....... i remembered very clearly that i stuffed my thumbdrive in my pencil case.... but i couldn't find it anywhere in my pencil case....... it might be in my other bag, but i really did remember that the last time i saw it was in my pencil case!!! argh.......i will KILL myself if i lost it cos i've barely used it for like, 2 days?! FUCK lor....... oh my god..... i'm such a careless bitch i hate myself.... so now i've got frigging NOTHING to do while waiting for him.... PLUS i've got plenty of outstanding work to do......... BEST. not in the best of mood these days..... i dont understand... how can any couples continue to be together without any communication. how can any couples last if one love to be autistic. i really dont understand. what for meet up if nobody talks? why do we meet up if both do not appreciate each others' presence? this is getting really tiring. it's just so hard to continue. i dont even feel like talking to him anymore. i dont feel appreciated by him at all. my presence doesn't mean anything to him. my conversations dont mean anything. he dont even bother to even ACT like he's listening. then why do i bother talking to him at all? i'm just waiting for the time for all this to end. maybe i should just move on without him. it's really getting on my nerves. affected me at work. affecting my appetite. affecting my social life. affecting me so so much. how can someone's mood change so fast? how can HIS mood change so fast? how can a guy's mood change so fast? i'm finding it too hard to keep up. forgive me. but i really can't do it anymore. <> not that i don't love him anymore. it's just so hard to love him EVEN more, given the attitude given by him, given the strain that's been put to this relationship by him. i just need someone to listen, to reply, and to interact with. issit really so difficult? I recalled somebody told me of this funny but true conversation. "How can you still love her after all these years? How do you maintain this long relationship?" "my love for her has never changed. My tolerance level did."

Mr petty is at work again. fucking hell. it's confirmed that praising the boy infront of my frens is JINXED. CANNOT praise him. Pisces are pretty emo, sensitive and imaginative ppl. Taureans are practical, down to earth, straightforward ppl. How can these 2 creatures match?

THE anniversary is nearing. And the Cow is so totally broke. How to celebrate 1st Oct? I was intending to treat for the anniversary for the first time. But now......... it's rather hard......... *sighs* I CANT WAIT FOR THE BLOODY PAY FOR THE MONTH

YEAH!! the IT ppl finally unblocked livejournal!.... happiness... i can finally post online now....... i hate waking up to go to work.... bloody HATE it.... my heels are KILLING me..... i think the lower part of my legs just got "bulkier"..... it's rather mascular now and i bloody hate it......... looks damn ugly........ it's so bloody B-O-R-I-N-G in office....

i think it's the first time i've blogged so damn early in the morning.... and it's so hot and stuffy at our area...... and it's damn retarded cos it's superrrrr cold at the other end of the office..... i'd rather it freezing cold lor.....i'm soooooooooo broke.... i've got alot of "contingent liabilities"..... i've got to pay for my own piano lessons now.... give allowance to my parents...... repay a huge amt of debts to the bf....... and on top of that i still need to pay for the stupid transport expenses........so by the end of the mth i'm only left with like, 400bucks for my daily allowances? which is bloody LITTLE... how to survive??? the only way to survive it is by skipping my dinner everyday.... or maybe for 4 days..... monday i can have dinner at the bf's hse.... *sighs*