maybe i really shouldn't have told the world im having my piano exams.... cos the world will know im going to fail.... definitely... for sure.... and i'll bet the examiner have NEVER seen such a failure like me before.... my fingers were trembling so hard i kept cutting off.... my aural is so bad i don't know wat to say.... i couldn't concentrate and i couldn't even fucking hear wat notes the examiner played.. fuck it........................ so now the whole world will know.... im confirm failing my piano exams... and the whole world will mock at me.... bet they've nvr hear someone fail piano exams before.. i dont know why im such a failure.... i can fail A levels.... appeal 10000 times also couldn't get into local uni..... after sooooooo long still can't pass my piano exams....... some ppl though they cant pass piano exams they can actually go local uni... some can pass piano exams but cant go local uni... but me? i failed both........ im bound to fail everything i do... i feel like such a fucking complete idiot. baichi. stupid. moronic. no one can feel stupider than me now. please. however stupid anyone claim themselves to be.

i just want to die. and fade off. so no one will ever remember me saying i've had my piano exams. so no one will ever ask me did i fail or pass. i dun want to see the look of disappointment in my mum's eyes again. i dun want to see the look of disappointment in my piano teacher's face. i dun want to see the look of mock in everyone's face if they know i've failed. i dont know the actual results yet. but i know it myself. its fucking obvious.